Since launching my website and blog three weeks ago, the response has been incredible. I’ve received voicemails, text messages, emails and direct messages from people across Delaware, but one message submitted to my Delaware Hotline has really stuck with me:
"Hi Chris. My name is *****.
I have adopted one of your foster "brothers." I think! Anyway, I'm really interested to read your blog for many reasons, but I'm curious if you will be sharing about your childhood and growing up with bio and adopted brothers and sisters and your involvement, if any, in your mom's foster care.
If I have the wrong guy, I apologize!!!
If I do have the right guy, I am excited to share your story with my oldest biological son, who is struggling with being the oldest and having an adopted brother with special needs.
I think you could be a real inspiration to him!!!!"
One of my intentions with the Sword in the Stone blog is to share more about my life and personal journey, including my upbringing as a child of adoption. I am proud of the many life experiences I have been fortunate to have, but in the name of honesty, sharing my story publicly is new to me. Receiving messages like the one above is teaching me the inherent value of communicating our stories, especially for people with similar life experiences who could benefit from the perspective of someone who has been there.
I was adopted by my parents Bernie and Peg Kenny at a very young age. My mother, Peg has a deep passion for babies: she has fostered over 100 newborns over the last 45 years and still fosters newborns today, right up until the pandemic. Sometimes she cared for two or three at a time. I witnessed all that came with the responsibility, including lots of poop and little sleep.
Some of the brightest moments I remember include holding and feeding the babies and letting them sleep on my chest while my mother folded clothes. I would get home from school and jump right in to hold and play with my foster siblings.
Some of the babies were dealing with very difficult circumstances, born addicted to substances from their mothers having used during the pregnancy. Watching them get sick with acid reflux and vomiting was not easy. Some of them came to our home with bruises on their heads and bodies. One baby had a cast on his leg.
Growing up around lots of little ones in the foster care system, I had some difficulties dealing with the temporary nature of it all. I bonded with the newborns and grew attached to many of them. It was hard for me when they would find a new home, generally by their first birthday, and I would never get to see them again. But when the babies left, my mom would go shopping to make sure they had plenty of clothes, food and new toys to take home with them. My mom really cares about her foster children.
My mom Peg Kenny accepting her Lifetime Achievement Award
from the Kind to Kids Foundation
Being adopted and experiencing the foster care system firsthand in my formative years has greatly shaped my understanding around the concept of family. I was the first of four adopted siblings, and I grew up with five siblings total. Our blended family has a vast mix of personalities, appearances and backgrounds.
I cannot recall exactly when I found out I was adopted. I believe it was around the time my biological, maternal Grandmother, Mary Leonard would regularly visit me from Philadelphia. I was very young and we lived in Voorhees, New Jersey, at the time. On occasion, she would come with my biological grandfather. I think that is when I started learning about my biological family, the Leonard’s.
My younger sister Melissa and I share the same biological mother, but have different fathers. My older brother and sister are my adoptive parents’ biological children. My youngest brother and sister were adopted from completely different families. There is a 30-year age span from the oldest to youngest of my siblings, all coming from different families. Part of growing up with adoptive siblings is that everyone is different, no one looks alike or acts alike, but we love each other just the same.
My experience as an adopted child brought up around the foster care system and into the Kenny family has made me an extremely strong advocate of the foster care system and adoption services. Adoption and foster care services may not be perfect in practice, as they usually deal with very complex and fragmented systemic issues, but the programs are an absolute necessity. Our family foundation supports several organizations and nonprofits involved in these areas including: (link to the orgs websites below)
These organizations are making sustaining, positive impacts in the lives of adopted children and families in Delaware. Similar to my experience, our foundation continually learns through reporting that the adoption milestone and foster system are crucial to the success stories of many children who are orphaned.
Adoption truly represents the delicate balance between nature versus nurture. On one hand my biological father and grandfather are neurosurgeons. My biological mother’s entire family are lawyers and engineers. On the other hand, no one in my adoptive family has graduated from college; neither my parents nor my siblings. Thankfully, my innate academic talents were given the space to flourish at 13 years old when my parents enrolled me at Valley Forge Military Academy, in effort to straighten out my unruly behavior.
My adoptive father Bernie was an airborne ranger, and as anyone who knows him will tell you, he demands continuous improvement every single day from all aspects of your life. He always came home from work for family dinners and spent every weekend with the family. While he was often a harsh disciplinarian, this sense of stability I received has stuck with me and influences my decisions to put time with my family first.
My upbringing, filled with challenges and blessings, has led me to where I am today as CEO of my family’s business, proudly serving 25% of Delaware’s population each week. I have learned that obstacles often provide the lessons we need to move forward. This resiliency provides me with an inner trust, strength and perseverance throughout all contexts of my life. I know if I remain focused and deliberate, the results will come. Essentially, enduring challenges makes you battle tested.
Questions? Comments? Contact my hotline here
Social clubs and groups like the Monday Club are not dissimilar from the merchant guilds…
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View Comments
I really enjoyed reading this article
A true insight into you and your great family
Very inspiring story. Thanks for sharing
Very powerful!
I love hearing this.
BLESSINGS/LOVE/ALWAYS CHRIS...
THANKS FOR SHARING...YOUR PARENTS/FAMILY/DELAWARE ARE PROUD OF YOU...
"COURAGE TO CHANGE"--
THE SERENITY PRAYER...
"GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY
TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE,
COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN,
AND WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.
Hey Chris,
Who knew?
I always liked you, and your family, but now I hold you all close to heart.
God places you on a path to make differences for Him.
Bernie taught you loyalty to Country, and your Mom loyalty to self. Being your authentic self will teach others why it’s so important to appreciate your past while making your future better.
Love is really the catalyst for change. Love heals.
I love your “whole” story. I love the whole you.
As the mother of a much-loved child whom we adopted at 4 days of age, I must share with you the verse we made into an adoption announcement:
“Not blood of my blood,
Not bone of my bone,
But still miraculously my own.
Never forget for a single minute,
You grew not under my heart,
But in it.” (Anon)
Chris, your Story is so humanly uplifting. I read it with great joy. I am from a large family of 10 siblings so I can understand growing up in a large family thought yours unique being adopted siblings. There are two of my paintings that relate to your Story...One is "Finding My Family Tree" and the other which you know very well, "Melting Pot vs. Salad Bowl."
I look forward to continuing my collaboration with Melissa to facilitate Art Classes for Children.
Thank you for all you abd and the Kenny Foundation do for me Community.
As a former foster parent and foster grand parent today, I really enjoyed your insight of the experience. As a CASA I would be interested in knowing if you had any experience with our program while in care?
Chris your story is truly one of unique life experiences. You are a man who has been blessed with a strong family “bond.” Your positive impact is truly a legacy to those who invested in you. May God continue to bless you and your family.